Warehouse 13 Wednesday: Magnetism

EPISODE 1.3 "Magnetism"

Original Air Date: 21 July 2009

MYKA: "I've been exposed to the artifact, I should stay locked up."

Warning: This review may contain spoilers

When I originally started this review, and this little Warehouse 13 episode review project of mine, I thought I would be most of the way through the series with a few episodes of Season Four left to review when Season Five came around. Since I had a lot of time I put things off and this review project got stalled. Then the Final Season Season Five started and I had barely started reviewing the first season. Well now Season Five is over and done and reviewed, and it had been a long long time since I had done anything about this pet project. I guess that is the "Pro" in procrastinate.  I rewatched Season 1 Disc 1 to keep everything fresh for this review and to get back into the habit of watching the series DVDs. OK on with the review/recap of this episode.

I find it interesting that in the beginning bit of Pete and Myka retrieving Marie Antoinette's Guillotine from the French Museum and replacing it with a replica, they seem to be a solid well working team as if they have been together for years, but during the bulk of the episode they still seem to be having a power struggle for "team leader".

In the Warehouse while putting the guillotine artifact away and even after Pete and Myka are arguing and shouting at each other. Myka is a bit ticked at Pete for not recharging the Tesla gun from whatever their last assignment was (forcing her to have a more physical fight with the Museum Guards), and about his not following the overall plan and ignoring organized protocol. They unknowingly are disturbing the zen balance of the Warehouse with their negative energy. Artie monitors some online news feeds seemingly while events are unfolding and discovers some possible artifact activity in Unionville, Colorado. He notices Pete and Myka arguing and tries getting their attention telling them to keep it down, but they keep on arguing. Artie is left with no choice he clicks a few computer keys and some levers and switches of other equipment and gives them a shower of purple neutralizing goo.

Back at the bread and breakfast, Pete and Myka have cleaned up and Artie briefs them on the goings on in Colorado. In separate one-on-one short discussions (Pete before the briefing and Myka after the brief) Artie mixes things up by telling each of them before they leave for the main mission of the episode that they are really the team leader in charge, but to let the other one think they are in charge because s/he is sensitive. Pete asks to borrow Artie's car since his truck is still where it was left apparently from a previous mission.

So what do an old lady, a teenager, and a nun all have in common beside freaking out and acting in bizarre ways that are totally against their normal nature? All three, and eventually a few others, were exposed to an artifact.What they came in contact with is what Pete and Myka need to figure out. Pete and Myka interview townsfolk and witness some further bizarre behavior. While consulting with Artie they conclude that the artifact must somehow affect the brain causing a chemical imbalance to whoever has recently touched it or been in contact with it. Pete follows some clues that lead him to an AA meeting and a psychiatrist who is the therapist for some of those affected, he finds a newly acquired pocket watch the therapist bought (he collects fine watches) that once belonged to a famous mentalist. Pete thinking he has made the score starts acting like the king of Warehouse 13 agents but since Myka had been affected by the artifact and was never with the therapist they are back to square one.

Meanwhile back at the Warehouse continuing power outages and electrical glitches that tell Artie the hacker is trying to figure out the power grid of the Warehouse. Leena asks him if he has had anymore success on tracking the hacker, but he tells her it is a pest he will ignore hoping it will just give up and go away.

Pete and Myka mentally retrace their steps trying to figure out what she came in contact with that he didn't, where had she been that he hadn't? As they are putting the pieces together they notice some of the town people including some of the artifact victims entering the town church. That is it Myka had interviewed the priest Father Braid (Phillip Craig) trying to figure out what had set off Sister Grace Ellen (Jennifer Vey) into making her think she could fly. They ask Father Braid if he had acquired anything new recently and find out he had received a chair that had once belonged to a famous ancestor of his James Braid a physician and surgeon who is known as the "Father of Modern Hypnotism". The springs of the chair act as a tuning fork when a descendant of Braid speaks near it, causing anyone who is sitting in the chair to release and act upon their subconscious desires.

Mack the Sheriff causes a commotion in the church sanctuary gun in hand wearing a bomb vest, ranting and raving. Myka confronts him to try to calm him down while in the priest's office Pete douses the chair with neutralizing goo. The goo doesn't work so Pete has to smash the chair with a fire ax. He runs out to check on Myka who is grappling with Mack who is still a bit psycho, he had set off her man issues with some sexist comment. The bombs timer on the vest is ticking away and in typical action drama show fashion gets almost down to zero. They manage to get the vest off of Mack and Pete runs out of the church tossing the vest with few microseconds left.

Back at the bread and breakfast, Pete and Myka report back to Artie filling him in on the artifact snag and giving him some bad news about his car. It seems Pete needed a small enclosed area to toss the bomb and well... It turns out to be just a psyche-out "gottcha" for misleading them about which one is in charge.

Later at the Warehouse the power fluctuations that Artie had been trying to ignore return, he goes to the electrical circuit power grid to fix things. He replaces a fuse, powers down then powers back up and the warning lights begin to flash spelling out "Knock, Knock" a few times. Artie realizes that the hacker has gotten completely into the system.

Series Regulars:
Pete Lattimer (Eddie McClintock)
Myka Bering (Joanne Kelly)
Artie Nielsen (Saul Rubenik)
Leena (Genelle Williams)

Guest Cast:
Sheriff MacKenna (Cornell Womack)
Ross (Ivan Sergei)
Luis (Pedro Miguel Arce)
Ellis (David Collins)
Father Braid (Phillip Craig)
Meg (Deborah Grover)
Dave (Bill Lake)
Tommy (Blake Pouliot)
Sister Grace Ellen (Jennifer Vey) Uncredited

I give this episode 3 Warehouse artifacts ***

Warehouse 13 Wednesday: Endless

EPISODE 5.6 "Endless"

Original Air Date: 19 May 2014

Mrs. Frederic: "Warehouse 13 is reaching the end of it's tenure"

Warning: This review may contain spoilers.

First a technical thingy. For these "fresh" episodes I usually like to use screen-captures from one of the online sites so I can pick some unique pictures. Unfortunately while preparing this review there weren't any around or at least no full ones to be found. One of the sources I had used for the last few (otvseries.com) had a "Bones" episode in the link for this episode, maybe I was just trying too soon. I'm only talking the freebies not the Amazons where you have to pay just to see the dang thing, when it is on a ton of other places for free. So some images I wanted to use I couldn't find readily. The ones I am using are either part of some of the online previews and promos or stills from hot off the press reviews.

This final episode was a bitter/sweet pill to swallow as many series finales are. Part of the bitterness was that damn Pete/Myka shipping they just HAD to canonize that crap. I am not against having characters fall for each other but not main characters that have already established the fact that it is one of those tension friendships that started with one person "lusting" (for lack of a better word) after the other and the other not reciprocating at all. From day one it was obvious that Pete was attracted to Myka but she WAS NOT attracted to him. That is how things should have stayed. I know people can change over time but it is best not to change characters. The only people who enjoyed this matching up were the fangirls who have been requesting it since day one, most of the other fans have been saying NO FRACKING WAY! When she kissed him to show she "loved" him ooooohhh I got real pissed at the writers and producers for that. OK end of this portion of my shipping rant.

Other fans may not like the series finale because of the format of it's storytelling. One poster on the IMDb.com boards called it a "clip episode", meaning it was a lazy writers episode made up from clips of previous episodes. Except the "clips" were new footage as someone else pointed out. I liked the episode and the format even though I normally don't like that lazy style. It does make for a good format to use for a series wrap-up though.

We start things off by going Back to the Future to 1889 London during the reign of Warehouse 12. A street tart is screaming and being chased by a shadowy figure one Jack The Ripper. He corners her but she is not completely what she appears to be and not as helpless.  She reveals herself to be Warehouse Agent H.G. Wells (Jaime Murray) by turning Harriet Tubman's Thimble, she shoots Jack with a Tesla gun and takes his lantern which is another artifact. A proper Englishman comes from around a corner and congratulates H.G. on her work for the Warehouse. I didn't catch all the detail but he mentions the previous 11 Warehouses were not in England and they make a note that the Warehouse will "never" leave England. The scene fades as a video image being watched by the Warehouse 13 team seated around a large round stone table that looks like something that should come from the Stargate.

Mrs. Frederic explains that the table is the inspiration for King Arthur's Round Table and is a sort of time capsule that records the defining moment of a warehouse agent. As part of the ritual of the warehouse moving the current warehouse agents "record" their defining moment into the table's database. It is the table that decides what part of a warehouse agent's past is their "defining moment". That moment in their service to the warehouse that best describes them as an individual.

Mrs Frederic suggests that each of the members contribute. First up is Claudia whose moment is a very silly huge tap-dancing musical number that is brought on by Pete pushing a button on an artifact (of course) which is the Marquee of the original performance of 42nd Street which causes an army of dancing girls to force the victim to tap-dance until they die. The solution to stopping the Broadway disaster is the combination of alcohol from Busby Berkely's Flask poured onto the tin pan from Tin Pan Alley. The alcohol is attracted to anything showbiz/theater related and the pan when flung seeks out anything showbiz/theater related. Claudia has to do a showstopping tap-dance to distract the showgirl army so the alcohol soaked tin pan can do it's damage to the Marquee lights.

Pete not wanting the warehouse to move or their team to be broken up and retired doesn't want to have anything to do with the time capsule table. When it comes time for Myka's turn it reveals that she has true feelings for Pete (shipping UGH) after her suburban Ninja cat buglers adventure with Pete. I think this is where the character Maddie (Jennifer Gibson) comes in, not sure as I didn't catch much of the character names from this bit. The artifact of the adventure was a five-tailed fox statue that turns whoever touches the statue into a Ninja.

For Artie a time-travel adventure is featured from a memory that Artie chooses and Mrs Frederic warns that it could backfire, but he wants to relive/record it anyway. So sometime in the 80s or 90s Artie takes a newbie Agent Scott (Samm Levine) for a first assignment on a case Artie has been trying to solve for sometime. The catch is he only has a half-hour to try to find an artifact that is keeping a night club from New Years Eve 1941 in a time loop. Once a year the night club appears at 11:30 PM and Artie has a half hour to figure out what the artifact is to snag it. He is close to solving the case but isn't quite there yet he figures a set of new eyes would help and it does. The artifact is Thomas Wedgewood's Champagne Glass which has the power to keep a moment frozen in time. A newly wedded war bride has used it to keep her husband fresh and away from the war America has just entered. She hasn't yet told him that she is "in a family way".

Artie's moment ends with Scott calling Artie "Dad". This revelation gets Claudia a bit mad at Artie for keeping his son a secret and she storms off. At some point in the episode it is also revealed that at this time Claudia does not want to be the Warehouse caretaker even though she has often said how excited she is and can't wait to become the caretaker.

Meanwhile Steve doesn't quite feel like taking his turn because he has never really felt like he fits in and has some secret one-on-one time with Mrs. Frederic as she shows him some of her past, which is kept secret from the audience as we are shown side scenes of Pete wanting to find a way to keep the warehouse from moving and Artie getting mad at the warehouse for just using everybody who ends up getting caught up in it.

When it does come time for Steve's moment to share we are treated to a tribute to the movie Fantastic Voyage Warehouse 13 style. Apparently Artie has gotten some kind of artifact trapped inside of his heart that is going to kill him, by using some sort of miniaturization device of H.G.'s Claudia and Steve are shrunk down and ala the movie must navigate via submarine through Artie's body. It is while Steve is in the center of Artie's heart that he feels the awesomeness of it and has found something he is a part of or some such nonsense.

After the stupid canonizing of Myka giving in to the Pete Myka shipping and confronting Pete about HER feelings for HIM Pete is ready to contribute to the time capsule. His moment is the longest of all of them and doesn't have any one specific event. For him it is all just everything about the entire warehouse job and the family unit of the warehouse staff that becomes his moment. I think part of this is the often forgotten alcoholic past of his. I think this "everything is so wonderful" moment comes from that and is the warehouse's way of telling Pete he is needed. I think this happy moment confuses people a little in thinking that maybe Pete is going to be caretaker since Claudia doesn't want the job. That is just fan confusion.

There was a wonderful moment with Mrs. Frederic and Leena where Leena tells Mrs. Frederic that she knows she is destined to die IN the warehouse. Mrs Frederic says that she will do what she can to stop it but Leena tells her that is is something that must be and she can't stop it.

Series Regulars:
Pete Lattimer (Eddie McClintock)
Myka Bering (Joanne Kelly)
Artie Nielsen (Saul Rubenik)
Claudia Donovan (Allison Scagliotti)
Steve Jinks (Aaron Ashmore)
Mrs. Frederic (CCH Pounder)

Helena "H.G." Wells (Jaime Murray)
Leena (Genelle Williams)

Guest Cast:
Scott (Samm Levine)
Maddie (Jennifer Gibson)
Jack (Jack Kenny) Series Producer (uncredited cameo as actor)

I mentioned other places that I love/hate this episode. For the most part I love it and about 90% of what is in it, the 5% or so of the Pete and Myka relationship crap I couldn't stand and was cursing too much during their "romantic" kiss. I am not alone in the thought that they forced the issue here. One person said that it was because of the shortened season that it seemed forced and that had they had a full season or more to tell things properly it wouldn't have been so forced and could live out naturally. Well that is a nice theory but for this series and these characters I think it was the WRONG WAY to go. A while back with another series I love Doctor Who they messed with some relationships and revealed that a character I loved was the daughter of two of the other more regular characters. That was another decision I thought was WRONG but I have since accepted that. I suppose sometime later I will accept this also, but I still won't LIKE it.

We the audience are treated to a glimpse of the future to "several decades later". To see Claudia is now the Warehouse caretaker with a different crew and that Warehouse 13 is still in the same place and hasn't moved yet. Series Producer Jack Kenny makes an acting cameo here. I wasn't quite sure of the significance until I saw some discussions online yesterday (Tuesday 20 May), I was thinking maybe the other two characters were also producers or writers even though I think I've seen the actress before.

I give this episode 4 Warehouse artifacts ****

Warehouse 13 Wednesday: Cangku Shisi

EPISODE: 5.5 "Cangku Shisi"
倉庫十四 (Warehouse 14)

Original Air Date: 12 May 2014

CLAUDIA: "It's like the transporter from Star Trek minus the dilithium crystals"

Warning: This review may contain spoilers.

Wow a major adrenaline pumping emotion driving episode. This episode packed a lot of action into it and a few twists and turns I don't want to ruin everything. OK so we open things up with Claudia going to the facility where the Warehouse Regents had her sister Claire (Chryssie Whitehead) in the artifact induced coma. Not only is Claire gone but the artifact that is keeping her in the coma is gone. Using the Durational Spectrometer Artie and Claudia discover that Benedict Valda (Mark Sheppard) from the alternate time-line has kidnapped Claire.

Valda gives a demonstration of power of some artifacts to a mysterious buyer telling him that instead of being stored away to collect dust they should be used and experimented with to advance science and civilization. He endangers a crowd of people in a park and is several steps ahead of the warehouse team. They save the people and must figure out what his plan is.

The team discovers that Valda's plan is to move the warehouse using Clarie as a puppet caretaker to his "Warehouse 14". Artie describes the special procedure that needs to be followed to insure the warehouse gets moved properly and the artifacts transferred to the new location. There are three artifacts that need to be used and they discover that Valda has them, except for one piece which they must travel to Boston to obtain. As with Indiana Jones in his movies they locate the artifact only to have it taken from them by their nemesis.

The team works out that Valda plans to move the warehouse to China and has found a location. Pete, Myka and Claudia use an artifact portal to beat Valda to China while Artie and Steve try to hold down the fort er the warehouse and keep Valda from completing the transfer of the artifacts to the new warehouse.

 While picking up the pieces so to speak, resettling things Artie and Myka see the warehouse compass (one of the tools needed to move the warehouse) turns back on. Artie Farnsworths Mrs.Frederic she announces that Valda's actions have set some things in motion that even she can't control or predict. Some of Mrs. Frederic's past was revealed earlier in the episode that confirms she is over 100 years old.

Series Regulars:
Pete Lattimer (Eddie McClintock)
Myka Bering (Joanne Kelly)
Artie Nielsen (Saul Rubenik)
Claudia Donovan (Allison Scagliotti)
Steve Jinks (Aaron Ashmore)
Mrs. Frederic (CCH Pounder)

Guest Cast:
Claire Donovan (Chryssie Whitehead)
Benedict Valda (Mark Sheppard)

On a light subtle reference to something else the artifact that Benedict Valda used to control Claire the Donovan Chester Moore Hall's Achromatric Lens has major similarities to the Borg from Star Trek: The Next Generation and later Trek Series.

Once again they brought the dang Pete Loves Myka shipping junk into the plot, just as NCIS: Los Angeles has been shipping Marty Deeks and Kensi Blye. Maybe both shows have the same romance loving writers. With this new plot undertones Pete has become more of a wuss (ditto Deeks).

I give this episode 4 Warehouse artifacts ****

Warehouse 13 Wednesday: Savage Seduction

EPISODE 5.4 "Savage Seduction"

Original Air Date: 05 May 2014

CLUADIA "Nice work ladies, take five."

Warning: This review may contain spoilers.

Hola,

Bienvenido a Almacén Trece y mi informe sobre el episodio "Salvaje de Seducción". OK do I need to use BabelFish again to reverse translate that?*

First off this was a very fun episode, it was super silly. I think the production team decided on this one to just pull all the stops out and say "what the heck the show is canceled lets just make a fun silly episode". I know some hardcore WH13 fans hate it because it was so silly and slapstick. So What the silliness is in part to the telenovela format style/nature. Anyone who was expecting it to be a serious episode is probably too engrossed in the show to notice any subtleties like genre parody. Also the artifact that Artie and Pete take into the situation was a clue that things would get pretty silly. I really loved this episode despite some of the lame silly things that I would normally wonder why did they overlook that? Or why didn't they fix that?

I probably should say that the episode totally embraced the whole Cinco de Mayo thing with embedding the main artifact of the episode inside a Spanish speaking telenovela style show that is entitled "Salvaje de Seducción" ("Savage Seduction") They even have the dialogue spoken in Spanish and have subtitles in English during the telenovela scenes. Pete seems to have a little trouble with the Spanish not sure if it is a character thing, an actor thing or just my imagination. Oh even the opening music was in Latin music style. I think the only other cool thing they could have done was to have planned a little better and started Season 5 a week earlier so that this episode would have been number 5 instead of number 4, but you can't be totally perfecto.

Ahora con la revisió - Um Now on with the review. Things started normally for our Warehouse Agents, which as we know doesn't stay normal. Myka is typing away at a laptop on the couch at the Bread & Breakfast. Pete comes in from behind her with a snack (a hoagie sandwich of some kind) he reads what she is typing over her shoulder and she snaps the laptop shut. She has been writing a novel, off and on for about a year now, mostly off. Artie comes in with news of an artifact ping and yells for Steve. Pete and Myka vocalize the ping should be for them but Artie explains that he wants Steve and Claudia to handle it to get Claudia away from her exhaustive overworking of trying to figure out how to completely cure her sister Claire.

The ping takes Claudia and Steve to the college campus of "Dakota University", which they get to via the GPS of Steve's Toyota Prius (a subtle nod to SyFy Channel's previous not so-subliminal advertising partnership with it's advertisers in WH13 to the annoyance of some WH13 fans). A student Charlie Battes (Lovell Adams-Gray) was giving a presentation when a shadow flies from the back of the room slams him up against the wall breaking his spine. The hospital reports he has alcohol poisoning but the professor says the student was clean sober while giving his presentation.

Steve and Claudia talk to one of the student's roommates and learns he was a party hardy type. They visit the site he was partying at and find a cellphone with a video showing him falling from a roof onto a car. The time stamp on video from the cellphone matches the time he was giving the presentation back on campus. His back injuries he received in the classroom are consistent with a fall like that shown on the video, but how could he be in two places at once? Based on some graffiti and a Latin phrase the student shouted before he fell, Steve figures out he was associated with a frat on campus.

Back at the B&B Pete's old girlfriend Kelly the veterinarian (Paula Garces) makes a surprise visit, she is very pregnant. She assures Pete he isn't the father, besides it has been over two years since they were together and she has since married, her husband is the father. The reason for her visit is that something strange and weird has happened and Pete works with the weird. Her grandmother Horntenia Hernandez (Teresa Yenque) who is always at home has disappeared and the weirdness has something to do with her TV which is showing the final episode of her grandmother's favorite telenovela "Salvaje de Seducción" even after it has been unplugged from the wall and power source. Another sort of subtle nod this time to WH13s own cancellation. While investigating the disappearance of grandma the house cat shows them what happened to her by getting sucked into the TV and onto the telenovela and there is grandma playing the role of Dona Fausta the family matriarch of the show, according to Kelly the character dies in the final episode. Carelessly Myka and Kelly are also sucked into the television, Myka has become a maid name Maribel and Kelly is a rich woman named Ms. Carmen Obregon who suspects Maribel of being attracted to her fiance Armando.

On campus while visiting the frat house investigating the injured student, Claudia and Steve hit some roadblocks by the frat boys. They notice one party hardy frat brother Ox (Serje Basi) headed downstairs to chug-a-lug they are not allowed to enter the house upon turning around heading to the street they notice the party boy's "Twin" sitting outside studying. Suspecting something is going on at the frat house they peak in a basement window to see party dude Ox down a pitcher of beer and pass out, a shadow races from him straight to his studying "twin". So the frat boys have found something that duplicates people, one lazy no-good party hardy bum and one goodie-two-shoes bookworm.

After a Farnsworth conversation/update about grandma's TV, Artie arrives at the home of Kelly's grandmother. Pete gives him a letter she had received recently from the producers of the telenovela, but Pete can't read it 'cause it's written in Spanish. Fortunately Artie can read Spanish. As a thank you gift for being a loyal fan the producers sent her a prop broach that had been used on the show. Artie and Pete see Nana wearing the artifact brooch (Dona Fausta's Brooch). Artie theorises that Nana's love for the show and sadness of the cancellation news turned the brooch into an artifact. They will have to go into the show to save Myka, Kelly and Nana, before they do though Artie hands Pete one of Harvey Korman's Cufflinks Kroman was famous for being unable to keep in character on The Carol Burnett Show. Harvey's cufflinks allow a person to stay themselves when they get into the role of a character. Cufflinks in hands Artie and Pete then enter the TV.

Claudia and Steve discover the artifact that duplicates people is a candle, Edna St. Vincent Millay's Candle to be precise. When the candle is burned at both ends and wax from the candle is splashed on someone, that person is split into two separate "twins" one is hard working and studious and the other lazy fun loving and wild. When one of the twins is knocked unconscious they are reunited (the shadow that jumps into the individual). Before they can get hold of the candle and defuse it, Steve gets duplicated by it. His wild fun loving self is a stereotypical word mincing and lisping homosexual horn dog, while his hard working studious self is a bit reserved and embarrassed. Claudia quickly likes the stereotypical  Steve and acts as his fag hag big time. It makes for many humorous lines.

Pete arrives in telenovela land but there is no Artie. He discovers he is speaking in Spanish and gets a big kick out of it. Soon he discovers he is the much talked about lover Armando and that Maribel is in love with him and that Carmen and her mom Alicia (Sonia Braga) are plotting to kill Dona Fausta and anyone else who gets in the way of some inheritance or something.

Pete and Myka discover Artie in a psyche ward in a straight jacket as Colonel Rafael Obregon the lost son of Dona and thought to be the father of Carmen, at some point Artie drops the cufflink he was holding on to and reveals that Maribel is his true daughter. A corny effect of the cufflinks artifact is whenever Pete, Artie or Myka receive the cufflink a trumpet blast sounds, they get a blast of air in their face which blows Pete/Armondo's mustache so hard it almost falls off. The trumpet blast is then followed by a shout of "Ole!" The first time it happens it was pretty funny but as the running gag of the artifact it wears thin very fast, still pretty corny though. The warehouse team eventually get their act together and stop the nefarious family members and find the brooch. Artie neutralizes the artifact brooch by breaking it returning them to the real world.

Claudia and the Steves track down the candle, the Steves fight over it and Claudia manages to get it and bag it. She is surprised that it wasn't neutralized and then figures out that one of the Steves has to be knocked unconscious. This she does by zapping wild Steve with her mini pocket Tesla.

Later in the evening as Claudia is typing away at something in the main office at the warehouse Artie storms in angry at her for doing something and reveals that someone has taken Claire. Cliffhanger for next episode. Aye Caramba!

Series Regulars:
Pete Lattimer (Eddie McClintock)
Myka Bering (Joanne Kelly)
Artie Nielsen (Saul Rubenik)
Claudia Donovan (Allison Scagliotti)
Steve Jinks (Aaron Ashmore)

Guest Cast:

Dr. Kelly Hernandez (Paula Garces)
Horntenia Hernandez (Teresa Yenque)
Alicia (Sonia Braga)
Maria (Barbara de la Fuente)
Nicole (Angelica Lisk-Hann)
Esperanza (Carmen Araiza)
Lupe (Stefania Serna)
Professor Moulton (Craig Eldridge)
Charlie Battes Frat Brother (Lovell Adams-Gray)
Bryce (Jeremy Ferdman)
Ox (Serje Basi)
Asylum Orderly Carlos (Dalton Brown)

I give this episode 4.5 Warehouse artifacts ****.5


*Original English for BabelFish translation to Spanish:
Hello,
Welcome to Warehouse Thirteen and my review of the episode "Savage Seduction".

Warehouse 13 Wednesday: A Faire To Remember

EPISODE: 5.3 "A Faire To Remember"

Original Air Date: 28 April 2014

MYKA: "Don't worry about it, I'll take care of Artie"

Warning: This review may contain spoilers.

This episode started to get back to the basics the series should be on. There was the main artifact quest search mystery and then the back at the warehouse picking up the pieces sort of back story part. Things start off at a Renaissance faire where Oswald "The Doofer" (Ryan Cartwright) is having problems juggling some wooden clubs and starts getting heckled. A mysterious masked figure magically appears and sends some energy to the heckler causing him to have a heart attack, the mysterious figure then disappears.

Meanwhile back at the ranch or rather the Bread and Breakfast Artie announces that the new dark vault is ready and he needs help returning the artifacts from that section, he tells the team about a ping (the incident  at the Ren Faire) He sends Pete and Steve to the Faire and enlists Myka to help with the artifact restocking. But first she has to "locate" Claudia. Claudia is determined to revive her sister Claire (Chryssie Whitehead) and somehow Myka has figured that out, she also has figured that she is doing it behind Artie's back.

At the fair Pete and Steve interview Oswald (Cartwright SyFy fans will remember played Gary Bell on Alphas which is sort of in the same universe as Warehouse 13 because of Doctor Vanessa Calder (Lindsay Wagner) appeared there as well) and learn that he has been cursed by the Faire's Gypsy fortune teller Madame Dooriya (Mary Lou Rosato) or so he thinks. He was actually cursed from the main artifact Mother Shipton's Tarot Cards which make the cards predictions come true. To confuse matters a little it was not Madame Dooriya but her granddaughter Catarina (Erin Way who played Kat on Alphas) disguised as Madame Dooriya. Pete and Steve deactivate the deck of cards, but their full hand has to be played out. Oswald has to show the courage the cards are drawing out of him in order for him to win the hand of the Princess of the faire, but his heart belongs to Catarina.

Claudia revives Claire with Myka's help by combining some artifacts. However in the process Myka gets Whammied by the Music Box that had originally possessed Claire. When Myka returns to help Artie restock the dark vault artifacts he discovers her possession and eventually gets things under control. In the process however Claire has to be put back into a coma. This was a disappointment to me as I thought they should have found a way to keep her revived, maybe they will do so in the last episode.

Series Regulars:
Pete Lattimer (Eddie McClintock)
Myka Bering (Joanne Kelly)
Artie Nielsen (Saul Rubenik)
Claudia Donovan (Allison Scagliotti)
Steve Jinks (Aaron Ashmore)

Guest Cast:
Oswald "The Doofer" (Ryan Cartwright)
Catarina (Erin Way)
Claire Donovan (Chryssie Whitehead)
King (Richard Fitzpatrick)
Princess (Victoria "Tori" Anderson)
The Herold (Andre Arruda)
Madame Dooriya (Mary Lou Rosato)
Joe "Puppet Jester" (Danny Smith)
Magician (William Fisher)

Except for the unresolved Claire in a coma problem I really enjoyed this episode. I think they are sort of getting back on the right track. I am still annoyed that the series is ending before it reaches its full potential. If I were a professional writer and could come up with new and cool artifact ideas I would love to work on a series of novels for the show.

I give this episode 4 Warehouse artifacts ****

Warehouse 13 Wednesday: 5.2 Secret Services

EPISODE: 5.2 "Secret Services"

Original Air Date: 21 April 2014

MYKA: "I liked it better when you just stared at my boobs."

Warning: This review may contain spoilers.

Before I get into this review I need to do a little bit of a rant. This episode touched on the subject of character relationship "Shipping" which I feel is OK for fan fiction but NOT for the actual canon of a shows on-air history, unless the evolution of the characters were planned like that from the start. I'm talking about the Pete and Myka relationship, they hinted at taking it to a real level. UGH! Warehouse 13 is first and foremost a Sci-Fi action/adventure with touch of Steampunk NOT ROMANCE FANTASY FICTION. I've seen plenty of fans for the Pete/Myka relationship in online forums, but I have been dead set against it from day one. Their relationship is one that needs the tension. They are also like brother and sister not romantic lovers. From day one it has been obvious that Pete has the hots for Myka (who wouldn't even H.G. was hot for her) but Myka has NEVER shown, shared or reciprocated the feelings/thoughts (I know the feeling). Hooking characters up just to have them hook up is never good for a show, especially if they have had this tension type of relationship. Shows like Moonlighting and The X-Files tried shipping the main characters and it totally ruined the show. OK Warehouse 13 is in the final episodes, but come on people don't stoop down to that level. Sadly it looks like the producers and the writers have listened to the minority fan-girls of the show that want the relationship to be real. Again UGH! The time they spent on the "relationship" affected my rating of this episode. Yet Again UGH! - End Rant

Now onto the review: This episode had three plot points when it really should have only had two. The main artifact was one of the main plots that brought in some Secret Service acquaintances of Pete and Myka who had been working on an unrelated case. That brought in the awful Pete and Myka shipping angle I ranted about because the pair of acquaintances Agents Ted Simkins (Mark Deklin) and Elise Mayer (Janet Varney) were partners who grew to love each other and started suggesting that Pete and Myka should follow their feelings. UGH! The third plot point was Claudia digging into what has become of her sister Claire (Chryssie Whitehead) whom she had previously presumed had died along with her parents. She gets Artie to show her what really happened since he had lied to her about it previously.

Somebody or more precisely something is killing Congressmen by spontaneous drowning. Long drawn out review short it is the effect of Alfred Dreyfus's Sword Hilt when someone looks at the sword hilt it flashes its power onto them so the next time that they lie they start drowning from sea water. Before Pete and Myka actually know what is causing the drowning Myka figures out a temporary relief by using a necklace made from the silver mines of the Atacama Desert (The driest place on Earth) which dries up the seawater in their lungs. The big revealing connection of the victims was some sort of conspiracy concerning Oil Fracking, yes a Battlestar Galactica reference is made by Pete the Geek.

Meanwhile Artie reluctantly shows Claudia the events that lead up to current condition of her sister Claire through the use of a pair of bronze baby shoes.When holding the baby shoes past events are relived,  apparently you can control what memories are brought up by concentrating on a past event. Claudia discovers that Claire had acted up due to the influence of Frances Farmer's Music Box which causes telekinetic outbursts triggered by anger. Claire activated the music box when she tested to see if it worked at a yard sale. Claire has been kept under an artifact induced coma by the Warehouse Regents through the use of a combination of Joseph Pilates' Resistance Bands to keep Claire's muscles from moving but keep her circulatory system active. and Oliver Sach's Record Player which keeps her mind in the coma.

Series Regulars:
Pete Lattimer (Eddie McClintock)
Myka Bering (Joanne Kelly)
Artie Nielsen (Saul Rubenik)
Claudia Donovan (Allison Scagliotti)
Steve Jinks (Aaron Ashmore)
Mrs. Frederic (CCH Pounder)

Guest Cast:
Ted Simkins (Mark Deklin)
Elise Mayer (Janet Varney)
Diane Hewlett (Megan Gallagher)
Julia Helmsworth (Emily Alatalo)
Claire Donovan (Chryssie Whitehead)
Young (15 years old) Claire (Abigail Winter)
Young Claudia (T.J. McGibbon)
Claudia's Mom (Fiona Byrne)
Clauida's Dad (Peter Valdron)

Due to the character shipping I had to drop my rating of this episode down one point. The relationship issue was too much of a major plot point. With that in mind I give this episode 3 Warehouse artifacts ***

Warehouse 13 Wednesday: Season 5 Begins To End

This past Monday (14 April) Warehouse 13 returned to SyFy Channel for the beginning of the end of Season 5. This past year I have had real mixed emotions about this whole "last season" business. I love the show and am very saddened that the network decided to pull the plug on the show around this time last year. This season is very bittersweet as it is the final season. I am glad that Sci-Fi had the decency to announce the cancellation before the final season had been filmed so that the writers and production staff could finish things off. Sometimes shows have been canceled with no warning after they had wrapped up the final episodes (Eureka and Alphas anyone?)

I wasn't sure if I was going to do a review of the Season 5 premier or not. I guess I'm going to do a mini-review.

EPISODE: 5.1 "Endless Terror"

Original Air Date: 14 April 2014

CLAUDIA: "Looks like your warehouse still has a little bit of a crush on me."

Warning: This review may contain spoilers

This was a fantastic episode I hope the rest of the season keeps me as interested as this one did. Last season there were a couple of episodes that were about 3/4 interesting and the rest of the episode had me thinking of what websites I need to surf to when the show ended. This episode kept me wanting more and cursing the commercial breaks. I am looking forward to late May when the DVD will be released. Supposedly the Season 5 DVD will have the Christmas episode from the end of Season 3 "The Greatest Gift" which currently is only available on the Region 2 DVD release. But I digress before I even began.

Endless Terror begins where last season left off with a cliff-hanger of course. Claudia was confronting Paracelsus (Anthony Head) who had just taken control of the Warehouse and evicted the team. He starts throwing dangerous artifacts or shooting their projectiles at her and she uses other artifacts to block or counter the attacking artifact. Soon Paracelsus realizes that the Warehouse is protecting Claudia because she is its caretaker, he also realizes since he controls the Warehouse he can control Claudia and he does (with the assistance of an artifact of course).

With Claudia's unwilling assistance Paracelsus collects and hooks up some artifacts to H.G. Wells' Time Machine to create a time portal to the past. Meanwhile the team after some failed attempts at gaining entry back into the warehouse with some humorous results, do finally gain access to the warehouse. The team still needs to regain control of the warehouse. To do that they need to split up, Pete and Steve are confronted by the Paracelsus Minion Claudia, who warns them about each of the artifacts she is using against them with some humorous dialogue. Artie and Myka go into the depths of the warehouse to the nerve center to realign the controlling flames that need to be in their proper alcoves they had been removed from to create the ring of fire Paracelsus' control had made them into. Once the flames are returned to their proper places Paracelsus no longer has control over Claudia, but he manages to escape into the time portal he has created.

Before the team can chase Paracelsus through the time portal the warehouse has been transformed. Gone is the steampunk antique mechanical designs to be replaced by shiny high-tech digital and computerized fixtures. They discover that he made changes in the past to not only become caretaker of Warehouse 9 as before, but he also has killed the regents from that time to become the caretaker for all the Warehouses from 9 up to 13.

Pete and Myka go back to Warehouse 9 while Artie goes off to confront the modern Paracelsus instructing Claudia and Steve to stay behind and keep the time portal open for Pete and Myka. Claudia follows Artie leaving Steve to fend for himself. Upon arrival in the past Pete and Myka are met by Lisa Da Vinci (Rebecca Mader) and accused of murdering the warehouse guards and plotting to kill the regents (who haven't yet been killed when they arrive in the past).

Meanwhile in the alternate present Artie is captured by the warehouse security force that is enhanced by artifacts that Paracelsus has duplicated and are lead by Benedict Valda (Mark Sheppard). Paracelsus throughout his reign as warehouse caretaker has experimented with artifacts on innocent people to advance the warehouse technology and increase his overall power. His medical staff includes some familiar faces; Doctor Vanessa Calder (Lindsey Wagner) and Hugo Miller (Rene Auberjonois) who in this alternate timeline are married and are forced to work under Paracelsus to keep their children alive.

Pete and Myka with Lisa Da Vinci's help, save the regents from the past, defeat Paracelsus and rebronze him. Rebronzing Paracelsus in the past cause the Paracelsus of the present to bronze once the changed ripples of time get to it.

The team goes about settling down for the evening winding down from the latest adventure, Artie while putting away artifacts notices that one of the artifact forks from the silverware set he is putting away is missing. He brushes it off with a sort of "oh well" attitude. We as the audience are then shown Valda holding the missing fork someplace else, setting up things for next week's episode or possibly later.

Series Regulars:
Pete Lattimer (Eddie McClintock)
Myka Bering (Joanne Kelly)
Artie Nielsen (Saul Rubenik)
Claudia Donovan (Allison Scagliotti)
Steve Jinks (Aaron Ashmore)
Mrs. Frederic (CCH Pounder)
Abigail Cho (Kelly Hu)

Guest Cast:
Paracelsus (Anthoney Head)
Hugo Miller (Rene Auberjonois)
Vanessa Calder (Lindsey Wagner)
Benedict Valda (Mark Sheppard)
Lisa Da Vinci (Rebecca Mader)

Season Five has started off with a big bang. I hope that the rest of the season continues to be as exciting and as powerful as this episode was. I wish the network executives hadn't pulled the plug on this wonderful series. I would really like to see the series live on in some form perhaps in the form of novels and some audio adventures.

I give this episode 4 Warehouse artifacts ****

Warehouse 13 Wednesday: Resonance

EPISODE 1.2 "Resonance"

Original Air Date: 14 July 2009

PETE: "Belski just got spanked.

So lets go strike while the butt is still hot."

Warning: This review may contain spoilers

OK so for this review I'm a little slow (as I am on most of my reviews dang) I'm not quite ahead in writing reviews as I had originally planned and I'm only 1 episode ahead in watching now. It is not as easy as it looks or sounds to do these reviews (and I'm probably the only one reading them). If I were to do this professionally I would have been fired long ago for doing what Douglas Adams did about deadlines by just listening to the whoosh sound they make passing by. ARGH! To paraphrase a common line from the show I need to view it, review it, and write it (then edit it and post it). 

This is the first regular episode of the series and the first one to show the opening title sequence, more on that sometime in a different post maybe.

After the standard "previously on Hill Street Blues" type recap, things start off with a bank robbery in Chicago, only it isn't a standard hold up. A van pulls up to the bank two people dressed in all black and wearing masks exit the van and enter the bank. One of them opens their coat and the view switches to the bank's CCT security system and interference blanks the screen.

Switch to deep inside the warehouse Pete is playing ping-pong vs. himself via Lewis Carrol's Looking Glass. A large mirror that allows the viewer to interact with their mirror image, in a later episode we will find out more about what the mirror is capable of. Meanwhile some electrical glitches show Artie that someone is trying to hack into the Warehouse's computer systems and they are good. Myka is outside the warehouse talking to her mom on her cell phone and almost pulls a Marsha Brady with the strange football artifact that circles the globe that was sort of introduced in the pilot. It may have some sort of satellite surveillance connection to help hide the warehouse, it is another artifact we will learn more about later in the series. Artie sends Pete and Myka to Chicago to investigate the bank robberies.

Pete and Myka get to Chicago and hit a little bit of a road block via the local FBI agent Bonnie Belski (Tricia Helfer Battlestar Galactica reboot). Seems agent Belski has done a background performance check on Pete and Myka's track record and thinks they are trouble. So she makes things difficult for them and takes everything they say with a grain of salt. The bank employees and customers have no recollection of the robbery.

The warehouse team learn that the robbers used an unreleased recording of a 1960s musician Eric Marsden (John Evans) to put people in a euphoric trance with the soothing song and then simply just ask for the money. This record is the main artifact of the episode. The recording's power is amplified and intensified with the right acoustic settings of the mason work of the bank buildings. The building acoustics were the reason why the banks were chosen.

Meanwhile Artie traces the hacker's trail to Washington DC and suspects Pete and Myka's old boss Daniel Dickenson of being the hacker as it is his computer the trace leads to. So Artie heads to DC to stop Dickenson. Artie gives Pete and Myka the address were Marsden is living and learn he is often in a semi-catatonic state, depressed and diagnosed with liver cancer with a life expectancy of only a year, the investigation leads to music company that holds the rights to Marsden's music who mentions the engineer who Marsden recorded with was last known to be a cab driver. Marsden's catalog being out of fashion with little to no demand conveniently attracts an anonymous buyer to make an offer to buy the entire catalog.

While in Dickenson's office Artie gets a Farnsworth call from Myka telling him about the acoustic nature of the banks that were robbed in an effort to figure out which bank(s) the robbers will hit next. Dickenson catches Artie "in the act" while he is doing something with the computer, I'm not sure exactly what Artie was doing with the computer (Erasing? Copying? Bugging?) but to hold Dickenson for a while he uses an artifact a "Dimensional Conversion Camera" that turns people into two dimensional cardboard cutouts until the camera is used on them again.

On the robber's next bank heist, thanks to Artie's research on the bank structures of the remaining banks that have not yet been robbed that fit the profile of the ones that were robbed Myka arrives on the scene as the robbers are exiting the bank. She gives chase and manages to catch the driver of the van who is Marsden's sound engineer Jed Fissel (Peter Graham). They take him into custody to the FBI offices, unfortunately Fissel's partners in crime spring him using the hypnotic recording system. Thanks to Pete's vibes and a heads up Myka is able to get partial protection from the effects by using ear plugs, but she only has time to get one in. She manages to slip her cellphone into the pockets of one of the crooks.

Artie restores Dickenson back to normal and discovers that he had been had by the hacker. Dickenson is not responsible for the hacking but his computer was used to make it appear he was, together they start a new attempt to find the real hacker.

To tie up loose ends and in an effort to minimize spoilers (or just open them all up) and shorten this review some, Pete and Myka locate her cell phone and discover the other robbers are Marsden's Nurse/Housekeeper/Partner? Jesslyn Henjik (Victoria Snow) and The Music Company's Receptionist/Marsden's Daughter Stephanie Goodison (Lindy Booth) are the anonymous buyer(s). Getting his music back helps Marsden to get his daughter back. Pete and Myka take the artifact recording and as Pete tells Myka the robberies are not their problem the recording is. Maybe Belski and The FBI will find the "robbers' maybe they won't that question is left in the air. I remember when I watched the episode the first time when it originally aired having mixed thoughts about letting the "robbers" go. The Warehouse team's concern is only in retrieving the artifacts, not all the police actions.

In trying to track the hacker further Artie experiences a shock that shows him some sort of mysterious vision/flashback.

This episode is the second of the series shown in sequence and Peta and Myka have clicked well as partners. I'm not really sure how much time has passed between the pilot episode and this one but it seems to have been enough for them to be comfortable relying on one another while on missions. It is interesting to note that in these early episodes Pete and Myka share one Farnswroth (apparently there are only three in existence the one they use, Artie's on one that Mrs. Frederic has) and one Tesla Gun an only prototype. There is a limited battery life for the power source of the Tesla so they have to use it cautiously.

I give this episode 3.5 Warehouse artifacts ***.5